Elderly People Are Like Children....Or Children Are Like Elderly People...

Short back story so you will further understand the gist of this blog. I have an electrical problem in my house. DH knew that the back end of the house needed to be rewired, yet failed to accomplish this task. Apparently, his 24 year old girlfriend is more important. So, the repairs are up to me. But, that's ok. I don't mind. I don't have to listen to him yelling, screaming and cussing at me because of something HE has to fix in the house. Now, repairs have been postponed due to the slight amount of money I have been receiving. Spousal and child support amount to about half of what I WAS getting. Seeing as how apparently I have a fictitious job making a fictitious amount of money each month, the support is LOWER than what he originally agreed to pay JUST in child support. Sorry, I digress. I am good. My kids and I are making it just fine. So, don't think for one second we are suffering. Because, we aren't, and we won't. Because I am an “awesome mommy”.

Back to the story. Electrical problem. Yes. So, the kids and I have been living with my grandparents while we are waiting to gather funds to repair said electrical rewiring of the ass end of MY house. (Yep, I said it, MY HOUSE. I have one! It's amazing. You should be jealous.) The grandparents are wonderful. I love them. When I say the things I do, I hope everyone understands that they are said in loving jest.

Elderly Vs. Children

1. Both speak loudly. This is either due to lack of hearing, or refusal to recognize that everyone possesses an “inside voice”.
2. If you want to read, watch a tv show or do anything else that involves no one speaking to you, you are out of luck. Just wait until everyone is asleep. Do it then. If that doesn't work, pretend you are going to sleep.
3. They are never wrong. Young ones are infinitely smarter than the elderly that don't rightly remember things the way they really are/were/should be. But, the elderly are convinced that they are always right. No. Matter. What.
4. The television volume must always be at 45 at a MINIMUM. There is no sound below 45. None.
5. Both have perfected sarcasm and use it frequently among themselves and against the offending generation.
6. Both are major fall risks. Does anyone know how nerve wracking it is to be in a house with children and elderly people?? I'm telling you RIGHT NOW....pins and needles all the time. Who's falling next? We spend the first years of their lives teaching them how to walk, and spend the rest of their lives catching them, picking them up, dusting them off and bandaging boo boos. This happens with the elderly too, only WE, the children and grandchildren do the catching, picking up, dusting off and bandaging boo boos.
7. Doctors visits are a major event. While we take our children to the doctor for “well” visits, our elderly do the same thing. They also need escorts and support. Much like our children, they don't hear or understand what the doctor is saying to them. (Most of the time.)
8. Generally speaking if something is needed from the store, you load them up and go get it. This is applicable to both generations. Oh, and while you are at the store, everything in there must be touched. It doesn't matter what it is....a pack of meat, toothbrushes, clothes, shoes, games, make up, hairbrushes. You name it, someone is touching it. This makes what should be a 30 minute trip for you or me....a 2 hour event. 2 HOURS PEOPLE!!
9. If they aren't speaking at EXTREMELY HIGH LEVELS, they are mumbling so softly that you have to ask them at least 5 times to repeat what they have said. 5. No less than 5.
10. Both generations are technologically challenged. The elderly can't figure out this “newfangled tv” or computer. The small ones can't seem to navigate without 15 tabs and 22 buttons that are all WRONG being open or pushed. I will say, the small ones are much better with the technology than the elderly. They are being raised with technology. Sometimes, I get so frustrated, I have to tell everyone that I will assist them at a later time. I walk away. I do. It drives me crazy sometimes.

As you can see, life has been a slap stick of comedy. Frustrating as it may be, it is my life right now, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Except for the DH's girlfriend. I would trade her for an RC Cola and a Moonpie any day, any time. That my friends is something I would enjoy. Another time, another day I will share more on THAT story.

Still praying every day for the grace and mercy to forgive those that have trespassed against me.

Potate on, unless I don't believe you are worthy of potation.

~Lou~