Another year older. So what?

Yeah, yeah, yeah...happy flippin' New Year. 2016 nearly sucked the life out of me. Some years are ok.  Some....not so much. This was a year that I'd rather not remember. So many horrific things happened.

My son asked me today what my resolutions are. Honestly? I'm not making any. I am going to continue hating, and loathing, and being me. Because it's what I do. I won't offer undying support for what I know is wrong. I won't cheer you on in your fucked up reality.

What I WILL do is continue to love and cherish those that are in my life, no matter how briefly they are here. I will still work towards that forgiveness thing (haven't mastered it, hence the above statement). I will read my book and work in my journal (every day) that my amazing daughter got me for Christmas. I will still love fiercely. I will laugh from my belly. I will cherish my children. Even when they piss me off.

I will also continue to wish hell,  fire and brimstone to rain on your fat, ugly face. I will continue to dream of getting my chance to take you on with no reprocussions. I will sit, from afar, and watch your "incredible life" shatter and fall like the great Roman Empire.

I will sit here and still have hurt feelings, and still feel pain. I will experience all of the normal, human emotions.

Doesn't sound like this year will be much different than the last few. The older I get, the more I realize, it's just another day. Just another drop in my ocean of life. The only thing different is the date.

I will say this:
I will not be disposable in anyone's life anymore. If I'm not good enough...too bad, you're the loser that wanted something far worse than me.

I should close this out. I'm going to eat dinner with my Little's, play sky landers and relish in their presence.

Should old acquaintance be forgot...

~Lou~

2015: A Recap. 2016: A Glimpse Of Reality.

It’s been so long since I last blogged. Let me see. 2015 was a year that totally sucked ass. I mean, really, truly sucked ass. It was awful. Horrible. Terrible. Really, a bad year. I’ll spare you most of it, but, I will let you in on a few stories from 2015, and the beginning of 2016, that broke me.

In January, I lost a very, very dear friend. Now, mind you, I’d never had the pleasure of meeting her in person, but we talked on the phone, we communicated online, and we truly, loved each other. She passed unexpectedly, in her sleep. She left behind family, and her two young daughters. I ached for months from that loss. I still find myself wishing I could pick up the phone and talk to her sassy self again. But, our Kimberly is in a better place now. For that, I am grateful.

On August 19,2015, I received a call from my Mom. I knew my Uncle was in the hospital, but, we all thought everything was going to be fine. How very wrong we were. The doctors called my Mom at work and told her that he had taken a turn for the worse. That the family needed to get to the hospital as soon as possible. I was a wreck. I got off the phone, and I wailed. I really, and truly wailed. No, I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want him to go. Not Keith. Not now. No. Just NO! As soon as I could pull myself together, I got ahold of my sister. We both went with Mama to the hospital. After the almost hour long trek out to the hospital that he was at, we arrived at his room in ICU. He was labored in his breathing, and not responding to my Mom. When she told him that she brought me and my sister with her, his eyes sprung open and he shouted, in perfect Keith form, “OH MY GOD!!!”. He was so happy to know that we were there. We spent the afternoon with him. We prayed with him, we laughed, we greeted the Hospice team and the Chaplains. They all spent a great deal of time with us that day, and were so interested to hear our stories of Keith. They had spent some time with him earlier in the summer when he was there for his disks that were broken in his back. They said they knew all about us, but, Keith had never talked about himself. There were two people who had been so instrumental in my Uncle’s life that helped him in the end, they were both there with us. One stayed with us until the end. We gave my Uncle a roast for his final day with us. We told all kinds of stories about him when he was younger, we talked about what an awesome Uncle he was, and how funny he was, and how much he loved music, and movies, and how he was a collector of memories. He laughed when he could, he was just so weak, and fading so fast. He could hear us though, because he desperately tried to interact with us. I had my own special moment with Keith before he passed. Mama and my sister had gone to talk with the Hospice workers. I leaned over him, rubbed his head, and whispered through the knot in my throat “I love you so much.” He opened his eyes, looked at me and said “I love you too.”. We both shed a few tears, and resumed our day. No one knew we had that moment, and this is the first time I have spoken of it. 

It was a perfect last day for him. The ICU staff decided at around 4:30 that they were going to move him to a regular room as his heart was just so strong and he wasn’t giving up. While they were moving him upstairs, I went out to make a call. When I came back, Mama told me to hurry up and get in there. At 5:25pm, Keith took his last breath. Surrounded by people that loved him dearly.  As heartbreaking as it was for me, and the rest of the family, he was ready. He wanted to go be with Jesus.

          We spent the next few months cleaning out his house, and getting his final affairs dealt with. It was hard, but we did it. Together. I have his journals that he asked me a few years before to take when he passed. I haven’t gotten the courage to read them. One day I will, and I will write his story. Just like he asked me to do. I’m just not ready right now.

          Life got to a semi normal spot, and as soon as that happened, my Grandmother got very, very bad off. January was a whirl wind of events. February came around and we had nurses in for round the clock care of my Grandma. We spent every day at her house with her and my two Uncles. We watched her suffer. We did everything we could to ease her pain, and make her happy. We did the best we could. It was a group effort, not just one or two people. It took all of us. Together. I made her the meals that she asked for, and she ate whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted it. No matter what. We grieved with her. We cried with her. (Against her will, but sometimes we just couldn’t help it, tears couldn’t be held back.) We sang for her. We retold our greatest memories. We spent two months remembering the good. We were able to do with her what we did with Keith. The difference was, we had two months to do these things with her, with Keith we only had a few short hours. There are many, many wonderful memories I have of the two months I saw her every day. I will treasure them forever.

The night before Grandma passed away, I sat with her alone in her room. I held her hand, and rubbed her head. I leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. A tear slipped out. I knew it was time. I knew we would get a call that night or the following morning. I told her I loved her so very much, and she told me she loved me too. I left without telling her goodbye that night. I didn’t want that to be the last thing I said to her. I left her with “I love you so much, Grandma.”. She passed away on February 21, at 7:15 in the morning, in her own home, in her own room, on her own terms. Just the way she wanted it to be. I know that Keith came to get her, and hollered out “Come on, Mama! You aren’t going to believe this! It’s FABULOUS!” I am thankful for the time I had with her. I am thankful that she was my Grandma. She was a lovely, meek, mild, wonderful woman, and I will always, always love her.

          Relationships among family members are funny. Some grow stronger, and some blow up in your face. Sometimes, you realize that blood doesn't matter as much as people says it does. Blood doesn't mean that much to me anymore. Being a family is much more than sharing DNA. It's about loving, supporting and carrying those that need it the most, when they need it the most. It's about uplifting, and being positive. It's about grieving together, and healing together. These two deaths were so incredibly traumatic for our family. One was a sudden trauma, and one was watched, painfully, day in and day out. It’s so hard to lose a family member to death, it’s even harder to lose a family member because they are so filled with hatred and discontent, that they tear you apart with their words. Especially after a death in the family. Lessons have been learned, bridges have burned down and are left smoldering. Perhaps someday all will be forgiven, perhaps we will rebuild bridges. I hope we will. For now, there is too much hurt. Too many things have been said and a simple I’m sorry won’t fix it. I’ve heard I’m sorry too many times.

          I sit here tonight. Reliving pain. Reliving sorrow. Reliving trauma. Why? Because. I need to remember this. There needs to be a record of this. Because it mattered. It changed me. It made me a different person. I have been changed, for good. Things don’t matter. People do. Memories do. Not things. Life, and how you live it, and the legacy you leave behind. Those are the things that matter the most. This blog was not nearly as long as it could have been, or should have been. Sometimes I get so lost in my head, I can't even begin to share it all, and sometimes it comes out like word vomit on a screen. Sometimes still, some memories are so treasured, that they must be kept in my head and heart. Some things are for just me. I know some of you may be a little lost on the whole story, and maybe one day I will share the whole story, but not today. The moral of my story here? Get out there and LIVE! You only have a small amount of time. Live it well!!!

~Lou~

P.S. There were a couple great things that happened in 2015. I had two more great nieces born!! YES!! TWO! I got one in May, and one 2 days after Christmas. I AM blessed. 

2014....a recap

Every year, on this day, I take time to pause and remember the events of the last year of my life. This year is no different.

In January, I celebrated another year of my life, and my nephew returning home from a 7 month deployment. That was an amazing sight, and my heart fills with pride when I think of him. We have been blessed to have him stationed here, with us. Able to watch his journey, first hand. Experience highs and lows, along his side.

I went to court more times than I would have liked for this epic divorce. It's still not finalized, but, meh....I don't really care. I have much more important things to focus on than him, her and their family. I have MY family, my babies and me...we make one hell of a storm.

I lost my uncle to cirrhosis of the liver, as well as some other health issues. The worst part was watching him not know who people were, where he was, what was happening to him. It was sad. I'm thankful that he is no longer suffering.

I celebrated my great nieces turning one, and the announcement of another great niece that will join us in May.

I made amazing, lifelong friends. Friends that will never leave my side. Friends that love and treasure me. That in and of itself is a miracle to me. For so long I've floundered around believing I'm not worthy. To you, my friends....Thank you for loving me. Just because I am me. You build me up, make me stronger and show me daily that I am worth it.

Along with the friends, I've made some enemies. Whatever!! Douchetards, asshats, twat waffles and thunder cunts all come and go. They aren't worth my time, effort or emotions.

There has definitely been some fab stuff happen this year. And without one person in particular, I would have never reached the point that I am at. I've become stronger, wiser and see things differently because of it. I'm calmer. It's been a gift. A gift that I hope I can reciprocate.

What's in store for 2015? Hang on, cuz you won't believe this shit! Hold my beer.

To be continued...

;-)

Later Taters!! Happy New Year!

~Lou~

Blog Is Back Open, Bitches!!

Well, it’s been a while. Let’s see…..where to start???

Oh yeah! The reason I shut down my blog to begin with!! The Epic Fucking Divorce. Papers are signed, waiting on final decree so that I can be free from the liar. That brings me to this: She STILL doesn’t know the truth!! STILL!!! He hasn’t told her the real story. We had a conversation about it when he was here for court. He still hasn’t told her that all that time he was coming home to see his WIFE and children. To spend time with his family. To be a family. Still hasn’t told her that she really IS an affair. Still hasn’t told her that he destroyed our family and that their baby was the absolute dissolution of our marriage and our family. I kind of feel sorry for her. But not really, because, let’s face it, she kinda did it to herself. She had warnings. Being lied to sucks. I know. I lived it for 13 ½ years. When someone tells you, you might ought to listen…..you know….older and wiser? Sometimes it’s best to stop listening to your fucking heart and listen with your fucking brain.

Enough about that. Enough about them. I will never get the apology I deserve. She will never understand until it happens to her. And she will NEVER be woman enough to stand to my face and say…”I fucked up”.

So!! What have I been up to? I’m so glad you asked! I’ve been a busy, busy bee.

(In the interest of privacy, I’m not telling all of the story. Not for my privacy, because, really? I don’t care who knows what….pretty sure one party involved wouldn’t care either, but, since there was not consultation prior to the authoring of this blog, so, I’ll leave a HUGE piece of the story out….)

I helped someone start a good sized group on Facebook, got lied about, kicked out, had my name smeared and maintained my dignity. I left the group with some very, very dear friends by my side, and started another group with an amazing, wonderful friend. You know, the internet can be a wonderful tool to help people, and a tremendous tool to harm people too. It’s a blessing and a curse. Through this experience, I have gained many friends…..all over the United States. Friends that are wonderful, amazing, LOYAL people. People that make my day complete. People that I couldn’t make it through some days without. Friends that have picked me up, dusted me off and are helping me to rebuild. Friends that LOVE me. Really, really love me. I’ve also managed to gain a few enemies. Enemies that are…well….thundercunts of epic proportions. You know the type….they just single you out for no fucking reason, and go balls to the wall out for you, and everything that makes you happy. Fuck it. I’m back to my fuck off attitude. Kiss my passive aggressive ass. I’m better than they will ever think about being. They could never, ever amount to the woman that I am. Oh, and by the way, if you are reading this, and I’m sure you are, back the fuck off of me. I’m minding my own fucking business, leaving you alone and not saying a fucking word. Don’t back off? I don’t give a fuck who I piss the fuck off…..I’ll take your ass down. You won’t know what hit you. I won’t take you down in a small way, it will be BIG, and EPIC and you will be trying to figure out what happened long after the dust settles. Don’t fuck with me. This all started because I made a fatal mistake by trusting YOU with a small bit of information. I don’t know what I did to you to make you hate me, but, it is what it is, and you have fucked up and made the WRONG enemy. Perhaps I should direct you to my ex best friend……I’m sure she can tell you what can and WILL happen when you fuck too hard with me. I’ll take it a while, but, I eventually reach a breaking point, and when I do……God have mercy on you.

What’s in store in the future? I have lots of plans to meet lots of my amazing friends that live in my computer! One I will be seeing again this coming weekend. Another I will be seeing SOON. Not sure when, but VERY soon. I’m making plans to head up north and spend some time with a badass Bronx bitch and her amazing man, maybe dragging someone with me, not sure yet. (I should discuss that with him……oops, if you’re reading, we’re planning this! Wanna come with?) I’m hoping to get to Cornville for some much needed fuckery with one of the besties. Looking forward to my birthday for the first time in years….epicness and ink….never gets better than that! Hoping for some much needed R & R this coming summer while meeting several other people from my incredible internet adventures. You know……I’m fucking popular, bitches! Be jealous. At least I’m not a mean girl.

I’m continuing on with being Epic, Fab and Amazing. With my littles. We have become fierce. The Fierce Four. Fuck with us. I dare you.

Am I still broken? Absolutely. But, guess what? My pieces are put back together. Though I may be cracked, I have incredible people filling those cracks with love. See, I’ve learned some shit along this fucked up journey…..it’s not a person that makes me whole, it’s love. Love. Something I have a lot of…..a lot to give, and so much to receive. It’s been hard for me to open up and receive the love that is being handed to me through this. Love was a hostage for so long. Something withheld. Something unattainable. Sometimes, things are missing and you don’t realize they are missing. You just become accustomed to life as you know it, along with the pain and misery. That’s NOT what it is! It’s always there, you just have to make the conscious decision to go after it. Accept it. Embrace it.

To all of my fans, thank you for believing in me, supporting me, and corralling my crazy.

To all of my haters……..fuck off. Kiss my ass. No matter what you bitches throw at me….you will NEVER break me again. I’ve dealt with this shit for far too long, and you won’t take me down. See, I like to piss everyone off. Live well, Laugh often and Love much. You can’t break my spirit. I let one thundercunt do that before. I will NEVER let it happen again.

Later Taters……

Hugs and Smooches,

~Lou~

Who Are You?

So, here it is. My life has been crazy. School got out, summer is in full swing, I’m still waiting on the epic divorce shit to be over with, life has somewhat normalized for everyone, which is a positive.

Along this journey, I have realized that family isn’t always family, and friends will come and go. That’s cool. I’m ok with that. It hurts like hell, but, it is what it is and if they can’t support me, then I don’t need them and their negativity. (And just a quick note....you never cared to read my blog before, so, WHY are you reading it now? You know who you are, but, I'll be polite and not call you out by name.)

I came across a question recently that actually stumped me. Like SERIOUSLY stumped me.

“Tell me about yourself.”

Ok, not so much a question, but, rather, a statement. A statement that I had absolutely no response for. My answer used to be this: “I am a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter, a niece, an aunt, a friend. I am a cook, a baker, a taxi driver, a counselor, a nurse, a mediator, a problem solver, a partner, a confidant.”

But, really? That’s all superficial. It’s not what people want to know. They want to know ME. WHO am I? Well, let’s think about this for a minute. I am exactly all of the above. Well, minus the wife and partner thing now. I got fired from that job. I should get unemployment for that shit.

On a deeper level, I am a soul. So, what’s in my soul that makes me, me? 

Lots of love. I love really well. Completely, with every fiber of my physical and spiritual being. I am forgiveness. Probably one of the most forgiving people you will ever encounter. Though, some forgiveness is harder to give than other forgiveness, and I’m still diligently working on that. I have a great sense of humor. I’m pretty sure that’s what has saved me through all of this.

But, again….is that what is really being asked of me?

I am have a deep need to be loved. I believe every person has that need. It’s born with us and dies with us. I have spent a great deal of time over the last year, believing that I am unlovable, and that I am not worthy of the kind of love that every human being deserves. I just want to be accepted and loved for who I am. Not what I look like, not what I can do for you, not what you expect I should become for you.

I want to be someone’s everything. The be all, end all. THE GREAT love of their life. You know, Nicholas Sparks style. All pretending and jokes aside. I think it exists. I’ve seen it in my grandparents, in my parents, in my brother and sister in law, in my sister and her marriage.….so why not me? Why don’t I deserve to have that kind of love?

I am tainted, I am sad, I am a little bit crazy. I am rude at times, I am sometimes humble (something I try to be always), I am compassionate. I have dreams and desires. I have fears, I have wishes, I have goals.

Still, that all seems so superficial to me. So honestly? I can’t give an answer to the statement “Tell me about yourself.” I guess I am still learning who I am. At 36 you would think I would have that down pat by now…..not true.

I will say that I am coming into my own. Believing that I am sexy, and beautiful and amazing. I have family and new acquaintances to thank for that.

I guess if you really want to know me, you have to invest time into me. Because I am a mystery. Even to my own self.

Til next time,

~Lou~

New Year?? Wait! What happened?

New Year? Already? Wait! What happened? What exactly went down in a year? Well, since you asked......

While I realize that the majority of the year my blogs have been about epic things, places and activities. I realized that the EPIC is only possible because of the people. The epic beings that I surround myself with. My epic neighbors, my epic friends, my epic family, my epic people that love me. No. Matter. What. Most of the time the people are a good kind of epic, other times they are epic shit bags and need to give the whole of humanity a break. If you are one of the good epic peeps, THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE FOR ME! Thank you for being epic, amazing and REAL. If you are an epic shit bag? GTFO. I have no time for anymore of your shit bag shenanigans. But, I digress. Let's get on with this final EPIC blog post of 2013.

Along the year,

I celebrated an epic birthday (Another one is quickly approaching....SHHHHH).

I got my EPIC Let Go tattoo (THANK YOU J-LOVE!!).

Celebrated epic achievements with my kids.

I found out that my husband had been having an epic affair for quite some time and due to this epic affair, supposedly he was having a baby with the new girlfriend. I had my suspicions for a long time over this one girl in particular, and the fact that she was saying shit about it on facebook, just confirmed his lying cheating shitty ways. This consumed the majority of my year. Fretting and worrying about what he was doing and if she was with him, which, I found out he moved her out to Oklahoma on our youngest child's BIRTHDAY. Yeah, total loser asshole of the century. Long story short, I am STILL MARRIED TO HIM, no papers have been filed, and the only thing set is custody, visitation and support, which is ALL a fight, except the custody. I still can't get him to come see his kids, and I still can't get paid what he owes. It's ok though, I am learning to let go little by little. The one thing I wish is that I could talk to his girlfriend. She seems to have some very wrong information about me and thinks that I don't have the nerve to talk to her directly. How very wrong she is. I would love nothing more than to have a nice conversation with her. Perhaps I could prevent the same pain and misery I have been experiencing from happening to her. If only she didn't believe his lying, worthless stories. LORD! Digressing....back on track now. WHEW!

Had a dear friend come visit for over a week. During that week, we spread epicness all over this bitch, got tattoos and graced several dining establishments with our epic presence. Yep. The city has not been the same since.

We had epic broken bones, epic surgeries (both planned and unplanned).

I gained an epic niece when my nephew got married! (Congratulations Ryan and Courtney Thomas! I love both of you!)

We welcomed a new EPIC member of our family, Lydia Ann Thomas. I love her. She is awesomeness. :D

The eldest and I attended an EPIC wedding. (My nephew, Johnathon, married my other epic niece, Courtney. Congratulations! Love you both!)

We took a road trip of EPIC proportions. Along the way we realized what true love, commitment and family means. We (and when I say we, I really mean I) experienced forgiveness and acceptance all in one breath. I saw friends and family I haven't seen in far too long, met family I had not yet had the pleasure of knowing, and was welcomed right back in as if nothing ever happened. This is quite possibly the MOST epic thing that happened to me all year.

I visited with a friend several times in the summer. We shared epic laughter, epic food, epic crafting and more epic laughter. That ended not so epic, however, nothing can be done to change it. So, moving forward.

The littlest little lost epic teeth (FINALLY LOST A TOP TOOTH!!).

I was betrayed in a very epic way. You know, when the husband decides that he only wants to keep the kids 3 days instead of 4 so that he can gather his pregnant girlfriend, (I stress the word GIRL, because she is 10, yes folks, TEN FUCKING YEARS YOUNGER THAN HE IS, which makes her only 10 years older than OUR OLDEST CHILD...Midlife crisis much ass munch?) and take her to YOUR hometown and drag her all over the town parading his infidelity all while spewing it on facebook, (BECAUSE HE IS STILL MARRIED) and thinks that no one you know sees them and that he is getting away with something? Yeah, that is epic hatefulness right there. But, AGAIN, I SAY KARMA. Lots of it coming your way sweetness. LOTS.

The eldest started high school, the little man started his second year in the gifted school, and the littlest little started second grade.

We celebrated my maternal grandmother's 79^th birthday, my paternal grandmother's 80^th birthday and my paternal grandfather's 83^rd birthday. All milestones to be proud of. THAT ladies and gentlemen, is an EPIC life.

We welcomed another epic niece and epic great niece into the family. Welcome to the family Jessica and Kayleigh Morgan!! I love you both and am so very happy to call you MINE. <3 p="">

I have learned what family truly is. Who is true. Who cares and who to tell to kiss my rosy ass on the way out of mine and my kids lives. I am thankful for those that are true family. For those that continue to love and support me and my children. Especially during this EPIC pain we are experiencing. You see, family is not always blood, and some say blood is thicker than water, I say the relationship you make and the TRUTH is thicker than anything. To those family members that say blood is thicker than water, I wish you well. Hopefully one day you will see the truth. Just don't come back apologizing to me and telling me that I was right and you were wrong. I won't want to hear it. I am moving on, and so are my children, WITHOUT you.

We celebrated Christmas. For the first time as a family without their Daddy. I want to say it was epic, and parts of it were. The joy on the kids faces, the happiness, the laughter, the shrieks of delight. The fact that they KNEW for the first time that MOM did all of this. That was epic. That was amazing. Having them KNOW that I did that. That I was the reason they got what they asked for. I did it alone. Without him, without his input, without any assistance from him. I DID IT. Yeah, it was an EPIC Christmas.

Although I suffered epic disappointments, and epic heartbreak, I learned that a tiger never changes his stripes, so, don't try to change them. A cheater is a cheater and an asshole is an asshole. A deadbeat is a deadbeat and a liar is a liar. I came out of this year with more epic strength than anyone can imagine. I may seem weak and sad and pitiful and crumbling, but you bet your ass, I am still standing tall. I take care of my business every damn day. I take care of my kids. I do what needs to be done, and THAT, my dear readers, is what it is all about. Standing up every day and working even harder than the day before to make life right. Doing what you have to do for yourself, your family and your little corner of the universe. Damn what everyone else says. It's not their corner of the universe, now is it?

Dear 2013....I know you came to teach me a lot. I appreciate the lessons. Some more than others, but, I appreciate them all none the less. You could have been gentler. You could have been a tad more kind. But, sometimes, lessons are harsh, and I guess I need these harsh lessons to smooth my edges and mold me into the perfection that I am to become. Thank you for teaching me.

Dear 2014.....Let's get this show on the road! I am anxious to see what lessons I have coming my way. May I make just one request? Could you try to make them gentle lessons this year? 2013 was awfully rough on me. ((HEART))

Now? Now I sit and wait for the ball to drop to usher in a new year, a new beginning, a new life. Giving it my best attempt at leaving the pain, and sorrow, and anger behind me. Letting it all go. Giving it up to God and the universe to disperse as they will. A new year. A new beginning. A new way to be epic. I am not making resolutions, I am making life changes. Changes that will benefit me, my kids, OUR future. Changes not for him, not only for them, but also for ME. I'm not gonna lie. For most of 2013, I was a hot ass mess of crazy. (Soak it up and relish in that statement sweetie. I was that way because YOU AND HE made me that way. Again, I say, KARMA IS A BITCH, WATCH OUT! She is coming and she is PISSED.) It's time for a change. I am stoked for 2014. Are you?

Later Tater's and Tater Hater's!

~Lou~

Elderly People Are Like Children....Or Children Are Like Elderly People...

Short back story so you will further understand the gist of this blog. I have an electrical problem in my house. DH knew that the back end of the house needed to be rewired, yet failed to accomplish this task. Apparently, his 24 year old girlfriend is more important. So, the repairs are up to me. But, that's ok. I don't mind. I don't have to listen to him yelling, screaming and cussing at me because of something HE has to fix in the house. Now, repairs have been postponed due to the slight amount of money I have been receiving. Spousal and child support amount to about half of what I WAS getting. Seeing as how apparently I have a fictitious job making a fictitious amount of money each month, the support is LOWER than what he originally agreed to pay JUST in child support. Sorry, I digress. I am good. My kids and I are making it just fine. So, don't think for one second we are suffering. Because, we aren't, and we won't. Because I am an “awesome mommy”.

Back to the story. Electrical problem. Yes. So, the kids and I have been living with my grandparents while we are waiting to gather funds to repair said electrical rewiring of the ass end of MY house. (Yep, I said it, MY HOUSE. I have one! It's amazing. You should be jealous.) The grandparents are wonderful. I love them. When I say the things I do, I hope everyone understands that they are said in loving jest.

Elderly Vs. Children

1. Both speak loudly. This is either due to lack of hearing, or refusal to recognize that everyone possesses an “inside voice”.
2. If you want to read, watch a tv show or do anything else that involves no one speaking to you, you are out of luck. Just wait until everyone is asleep. Do it then. If that doesn't work, pretend you are going to sleep.
3. They are never wrong. Young ones are infinitely smarter than the elderly that don't rightly remember things the way they really are/were/should be. But, the elderly are convinced that they are always right. No. Matter. What.
4. The television volume must always be at 45 at a MINIMUM. There is no sound below 45. None.
5. Both have perfected sarcasm and use it frequently among themselves and against the offending generation.
6. Both are major fall risks. Does anyone know how nerve wracking it is to be in a house with children and elderly people?? I'm telling you RIGHT NOW....pins and needles all the time. Who's falling next? We spend the first years of their lives teaching them how to walk, and spend the rest of their lives catching them, picking them up, dusting them off and bandaging boo boos. This happens with the elderly too, only WE, the children and grandchildren do the catching, picking up, dusting off and bandaging boo boos.
7. Doctors visits are a major event. While we take our children to the doctor for “well” visits, our elderly do the same thing. They also need escorts and support. Much like our children, they don't hear or understand what the doctor is saying to them. (Most of the time.)
8. Generally speaking if something is needed from the store, you load them up and go get it. This is applicable to both generations. Oh, and while you are at the store, everything in there must be touched. It doesn't matter what it is....a pack of meat, toothbrushes, clothes, shoes, games, make up, hairbrushes. You name it, someone is touching it. This makes what should be a 30 minute trip for you or me....a 2 hour event. 2 HOURS PEOPLE!!
9. If they aren't speaking at EXTREMELY HIGH LEVELS, they are mumbling so softly that you have to ask them at least 5 times to repeat what they have said. 5. No less than 5.
10. Both generations are technologically challenged. The elderly can't figure out this “newfangled tv” or computer. The small ones can't seem to navigate without 15 tabs and 22 buttons that are all WRONG being open or pushed. I will say, the small ones are much better with the technology than the elderly. They are being raised with technology. Sometimes, I get so frustrated, I have to tell everyone that I will assist them at a later time. I walk away. I do. It drives me crazy sometimes.

As you can see, life has been a slap stick of comedy. Frustrating as it may be, it is my life right now, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Except for the DH's girlfriend. I would trade her for an RC Cola and a Moonpie any day, any time. That my friends is something I would enjoy. Another time, another day I will share more on THAT story.

Still praying every day for the grace and mercy to forgive those that have trespassed against me.

Potate on, unless I don't believe you are worthy of potation.

~Lou~