Yeah, yeah, yeah...happy flippin' New Year. 2016 nearly sucked the life out of me. Some years are ok. Some....not so much. This was a year that I'd rather not remember. So many horrific things happened.
My son asked me today what my resolutions are. Honestly? I'm not making any. I am going to continue hating, and loathing, and being me. Because it's what I do. I won't offer undying support for what I know is wrong. I won't cheer you on in your fucked up reality.
What I WILL do is continue to love and cherish those that are in my life, no matter how briefly they are here. I will still work towards that forgiveness thing (haven't mastered it, hence the above statement). I will read my book and work in my journal (every day) that my amazing daughter got me for Christmas. I will still love fiercely. I will laugh from my belly. I will cherish my children. Even when they piss me off.
I will also continue to wish hell, fire and brimstone to rain on your fat, ugly face. I will continue to dream of getting my chance to take you on with no reprocussions. I will sit, from afar, and watch your "incredible life" shatter and fall like the great Roman Empire.
I will sit here and still have hurt feelings, and still feel pain. I will experience all of the normal, human emotions.
Doesn't sound like this year will be much different than the last few. The older I get, the more I realize, it's just another day. Just another drop in my ocean of life. The only thing different is the date.
I will say this:
I will not be disposable in anyone's life anymore. If I'm not good enough...too bad, you're the loser that wanted something far worse than me.
I should close this out. I'm going to eat dinner with my Little's, play sky landers and relish in their presence.
Should old acquaintance be forgot...
~Lou~
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